What’s the difference between shyness and social anxiety?

The terms “shyness” and “social anxiety” are sometimes used interchangeably because they each involve feeling uncomfortable in social situations.

However, feeling shy, or having a shy personality, is just not the identical as experiencing social anxiety (short for “social anxiety disorder”).

Here are a number of the similarities and differences, and what the excellence means.

How are they similar?

It could be normal to feel nervous and even stressed in recent social situations or when interacting with recent people. And everyone differs in how comfortable they feel when interacting with others.

For people who find themselves shy or socially anxious, social situations could be very uncomfortable, stressful and even threatening. There is usually a strong desire to avoid these situations.

People who’re shy or socially anxious may respond with “flight” (by withdrawing from the situation or avoiding it entirely), “freeze” (by detaching themselves or feeling disconnected from their body), or “fawn” (by attempting to appease or placate others).

A fancy interaction of biological and environmental aspects can also be thought to influence the event of shyness and social anxiety.

For example, each shy children and adults with social anxiety have neural circuits that respond strongly to stressful social situations, comparable to being excluded or not noted.

People who’re shy or socially anxious commonly report physical symptoms of stress in certain situations, and even when anticipating them. These include sweating, blushing, trembling, an increased heart rate or hyperventilation.

How are they different?

Social anxiety is a diagnosable mental health condition and is an example of an anxiety disorder.

For individuals who struggle with social anxiety, social situations – including social interactions, being observed and performing in front of others – trigger intense fear or anxiety about being judged, criticised or rejected.

To be diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, social anxiety must be persistent (lasting greater than six months) and have a major negative impact on essential areas of life comparable to work, school, relationships, and identity or sense of self.

Many adults with social anxiety report feeling shy, timid and lacking in confidence after they were a toddler. However, not all shy children go on to develop social anxiety. Also, feeling shy doesn’t necessarily mean an individual meets the standards for social anxiety disorder.

People vary in how shy or outgoing they’re, depending on where they’re, who they’re with and the way comfortable they feel within the situation. This is especially true for youngsters, who sometimes appear reserved and shy with strangers and peers, and outgoing with known and trusted adults.

Individual differences in temperament, personality traits, early childhood experiences, family upbringing and environment, and parenting style, may also influence the extent to which individuals feel shy across social situations.

However, individuals with social anxiety have overwhelming fears about embarrassing themselves or being negatively judged by others; they experience these fears consistently and across multiple social situations.

The intensity of this fear or anxiety often leads people to avoid situations. If avoiding a situation is just not possible, they could engage in safety behaviours, comparable to taking a look at their phone, wearing sunglasses or rehearsing conversation topics.

The effect social anxiety can have on an individual’s life could be far-reaching. It may include low self-esteem, breakdown of friendships or romantic relationships, difficulties pursuing and progressing in a profession, and dropping out of study.

The impact this has on an individual’s ability to steer a meaningful and fulfilling life, and the distress this causes, differentiates social anxiety from shyness.

Children can show similar signs or symptoms of social anxiety to adults. But they may additionally feel upset and teary, irritable, have temper tantrums, cling to their parents, or refuse to talk in certain situations.

If left untreated, social anxiety can set children and young people up for a way forward for missed opportunities, so early intervention is vital. With skilled and parental support, patience and guidance, children could be taught strategies to beat social anxiety.

Why does the excellence matter?

Social anxiety disorder is a mental health condition that persists for individuals who don’t receive adequate support or treatment.

Without treatment, it may possibly result in difficulties in education and at work, and in developing meaningful relationships.

Receiving a diagnosis of social anxiety disorder could be validating for some people because it recognises the extent of distress and that its impact is more intense than shyness.

A diagnosis can be a vital first step in accessing appropriate, evidence-based treatment.

Different people have different support needs. However, clinical practice guidelines recommend cognitive-behavioural therapy (a form of psychological therapy that teaches people practical coping skills). This is usually used with exposure therapy (a form of psychological therapy that helps people face their fears by breaking them down right into a series of step-by-step activities). This combination is effective in-person, online and in transient treatments.

For more support or further reading

Online resources about social anxiety include: