6 Ways to Stop Worrying About the the Small Stuff

As much as worry and fear can bring us to our knees sometimes, much of what people get challenged by is just not about life changing, catastrophic events but slightly the smaller things and the meaning that’s fabricated from them.  Many suffer unnecessarily when their nervous systems are hijacked by worry, normally not serving well and impacting overall happiness.

Your pondering can get fuzzy and persuade you there’s reason to panic because it appears like an emergency!  If core beliefs developed way back in your loved ones of origin get caught up into this, it’s much more complicated.  For example, consider how failure for somebody who’s perfectionistic and operates under the idea that they could impact them. Worries akin to these can feel overwhelming because there’s rather a lot at stake for us emotionally.

Here are another examples of worries involving self-esteem:

If you permit the sort of worry to eat you, it is just not only distressing but can result in a self-fulfilling prophecy should you behave as if it’s already true.

There are many other forms of “small stuff” worries which might cause unnecessary suffering including those related to perfectionism, performance, a powerful negativity bias (bad things will occur) etc. And in a few of these situations it’s possible you’ll even have zero control over them yet you continue to get physiologically activated and panicked.

• What if there’s traffic?
• What if it rains?
• What if there is no such thing as a parking?
• What if the sport is cancelled?

Here are 6 ways to stop worrying concerning the small stuff:

1. 1. Stop getting ahead of yourself. If you reside as if the long run has already happened you’re having an emotional response (worry) to something that hasn’t happened yet.  Practice staying within the moment by trying this:
      • Focus on an object within the room with you.  Notice it in a way you never have before.  What color is it?  What shape is it?  Is it possibly more beautiful than you realized?   Breathe slowly.
   2. Put your hand over your heart. If you’re frightened, stressed or fearful, it’s likely your fight or flight system is activated and your cortisol levels are elevated.  Oxytocin is an antidote to the stress hormone, cortisol.  Many people can release it themselves.
      • Place your hand over your heart, close your eyes and picture someone you are feeling completely secure with.  A beloved pet will work too.  As you remember feeling loved, sit with this sense for no less than 30 seconds.  Notice the calm.
   3. Practice self acceptance. Because worry can orbit around an unsure sense of self, it’s necessary to try shifting your self concept from negative to positive.
      • Decide on an affirmation for yourself (ex: I’m lovable, I can be okay, etc).  Every day, either say this affirmation aloud or in your head to assist integrate this belief into your heart and mind.
   4. Reframe your worry.  Remember that your perceptions drive your worry.    You are the just one who can assign your intending to things.  If you assign worry to quite a lot of things attempt to practice reframing it to something more productive.
      • Consider something you regularly worry about.  Is there one other way you possibly can see this example?  What is the worst thing that may occur in case your worry is true.  Is it the tip of the world?  Is there an answer or fix?  Pick your worry battles.
   5. Find a trusted sounding board. A friend may be called upon to assist make clear your pondering.  Get someone in your team, explain what you’re working on and the way they might help.  When you end up worrying, call on them to make it easier to process.
2. Identify what keeps you stuck – and work on it. If you’ve tried the above suggestions and are usually not finding relief, a therapist can make it easier to get unstuck.  There could also be prior experiences in your loved ones of origin that explains why it’s more difficult for you.

If going to therapy not an option for whatever reason, try my guide Family of Origin:  Untangle Your Unhealthy Roots to assist discover, understand and resolve relevant emotional wounds on your individual.

Worry and fear are all valid human emotions.  But living in a chronic state of tension amounts to unnecessary suffering.  Learning to more effectively let the less necessary things roll off your back are an indicator of resilience and guaranteed improvement in your overall emotional health.

Lastly, bear in mind that worry and fear can morph into clinical anxiety which if persistent enough might have additional resources for relief.  The above exercises might help but when not sufficient, discover a therapist for the support you wish.

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If you’re a resident of California needing help managing your worry, find out about my Marin Therapy practice.  If you’re outside of the state, the Psychology Today Therapist Directory is a very good resource.

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